Gentle Recovery

Growing in the Hard Places

2012-01-28T04:23:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday and Laura at Brag on Fridays and Daily Walk in Grace

"I was confused. You cleared my mind. I sold my soul. You bought it back for me and held me up and gave me dignity. You gave me hope when I was at the end and turned my lies back into truth again. You even called me friend." Anne Murray

Hope - It's the most important thing a person can have. Anyone can get by with few creature comforts....and even little food......but nobody can make it without hope.

Hope is what has always kept me going no matter how pitch black it got....or how desperate.
Hope.....it's the thing that kept me holding on when it all seemed so pointless.
Hope....it came from Him.....a tiny flickering hope....that pushed me to hold on.....and never give up....even when so many of my friends were dying around me.

Hope....it came in a stranger's smile....and even a small flower growing in a rocky place. I want to tell everybody who'se fighting a tough battle...don't ever give up....keep holding on and hope....believe. Things really do turn around.....

Below is a trailer my dgt made for me last year. I posted it before but in writing my friend's story.....it reminds me how much He reaches out to all of us....sometimes in small ways...sometimes big.....to give us the hope we need so we don't give up.

Thankful Thursday

2012-01-26T03:39:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Cami at First Day of my Life

Gratitude is one of the sweet shortcuts to finding peace of mind and happiness inside. No matter what's going on outside of us, there's always something we could be grateful for." Barry Neil Kaufman

-Learning to exhale when things go wrong. My car should have been fixed on Monday. It was a simple bumper job. The garage called....they scratched it. Part of me wanted to get upset....the other part just wanted to breathe b/c in the grand scheme of things....this is just a peewee thing.
-my sister who cracks me up with her craziness. I love listening to her stories and hearing her beautiful laugh.
-Researching and finding key people for the story I'm working on...people in another city who have pieces of information I need. I've discovered how much I love love love uncovering hidden stories.
-my oldest dgt. short-listed again for another poetry contest. It was for a poem called Rough not Tough. It's a beautiful piece about not judging people by the way they look. I love her heart.
-Mostly for His friendship...it's a constant....one that I can always count on. Knowing He's there....and will never ever leave, gives me incredible courage to face life's challenges.

Soaring

2012-01-21T05:03:00.000-08:00

“One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar.” Helen Keller

I didn't know all I had to do was ask... It sounded too simple. But yesterday that's what I did. I asked and all of a sudden the thing I wanted came. The people I needed stepped forward. I got what I had the courage to ask for.

I feel humbled.....overwhelmed. I know it's His love....waves of it....that makes me feel like I'm flying. And the best ever....He accepts me....just as I am.....and loves me.....just because.

Feeling His love frees me....gives me courage.....makes me want to reach higher....stretch farther....live better.....and be the best I can be. I'm so grateful that He loves me and accepts me.......

Just as I am.....

Thankful Thursday

2012-01-19T07:58:00.000-08:00

“Many things are not as they seem: The worst things in life never are.” Jim Butcher

It's winter. The temps have been in the minuses.....the weather is definitely cold. But in the morning.....when I get up..... the sun is brilliant. It makes me think it's not so cold out there. Then I step outside.....and it hits me just how decieving that sun really is. Deception.....even nature does it. But there's also truth....awesome incredible truth and nature shows that too. It's easy to be deceived.....but once you know the truth....Wow!!! This week I'm grateful for.....

-Watching the women in my group grasp onto 'truth' and shake free of the lies they've held onto for so long..lies that have insisted that they're not good enough. Listening to them become empowered is awesome.
-knowing that each one of us is unique and all of us have a life story worth sharing...and hearing their stories makes me respect others more.
-I walked out to the mall parking lot one day and found my car passanger side smashed. I went back in and I was told a 17 year old had hit it. The kid called police and left all his info. The truth....there are some pretty amazing and honest kids out there like that boy.
-writing my friend's story shows me how easy it is for lies to become deeply engrained. I love that F. survived and lived to tell the tale.
-The best....His truth that shines in my heart. It trumps everything else and always comes out on top. And the best it doesn`t matter how much we mess up....He always gives us second and third and even more `second` chances...

Linking with Cami at Thankful Thursday

Creation Calls

2012-01-14T05:19:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday & Laura at Brag on Friday

“Billions and billions of stars and planets out there, and behind them all are God.” Billy Graham.

Sometimes when I go outside at night and look up at the sky......I feel this amazing peace that everything is as it's supposed to be. It doesn't matter if things in my world are upside down or right side up.....all that matters is that I know I'm a small part of this big old world....and that the One who runs with me...who is always in my corner......has got everything under His control.

It's too cold now to go running in the woods....or hiking in the hills. But I can close my eyes....and imagine being on those mountains....or walking along the shore of the lake or standing under the massive trees....and I can breath in His presence just as if I was there.

Creation calls.....it pulls me away from the mundane...and quiets life's frustrations and routines and worries and fears and dreams that sometimes seem pointless.....

Creation calls.....

How can I say there is no God.......

Thankful Thursday

2012-01-12T03:36:00.000-08:00

"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies" Stephen King

The week for me has has been characterized by 'stories.' I'm rereading Anne Frank, the 14 yr. old who lived in a 'crazy time.' In spite of the awfulness of her situation......Anne always clung to hope.. That hope carried her and made her life shine.

I've been spending hours pouring over archives in preparation of writing my friend's life story. He's an older guy who lived hard, tough, fast. The course of his life shows that God really does trump man's best efforts. Reading...listening.....writing these stories has infused me with a greater belief that nothing is ever impossible to overcome. I'm grateful for....

-For the opportunity to share my story and the hope I've found in God with a group of women this week.
-Opportunities - leaving to go to the women's prison in a couple of hours. I"m nervous and excited but really want to shine hope.
-I managed to connect with people who've helped me access archives that I just couldn't seem to find. With their help....boom.....the material has been pouring in.
-for M. who believes in me and has let me ignite the passion of my writing in her. She's running with me in so many ways that it leaves me more excited and humbled and for Jules who always sends me courage and strength that makes me me feel like I can fly.

- Mostly....that He's become an anchor...something solid for me to hold onto. Because of Him.....I'm not afraid anymore. B/c of Him.....I want to make as many hope dents in the world that I can.

Guys can I ask something -

prayer for Sandi at Rose Chintz Cottage...she's going for surgery this morning. And Ginny who'se recovering.

Hoping you all have an awesome incredible super terrific day out there.

Everyone Needs Compassion

2012-01-07T05:32:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday and Laura....Brag on Friday

"Walk where your heart leads you" GAO XINGJIAN

I've got plans for this year...goals....dreams...
to live with purpose...to make a difference....
to use everything I've gone through to shine a Light wherever I can...so others can find freedom too. A few things in the works which I'm both excited and nervous about.....

-received an email about the women's group I'll be running starting next week...registration is full. Talking to all those women makes me feel like bungee jumping...but the desire to show hope pushes me to not chicken out.
-I spoke with a chaplain of a women's prison who just finished reading my book. He was blown away by it and now we're meeting this coming week to discuss how I might be able to help incarcerated women in desperate need of hope. Gulp!!!

-an old friend I lost touch with found me. He's had a tough life....spent most of it in and out of jail. Something happened to him when he was ten which changed and hardened him. But now he's a believer and travels all over the world telling people about his faith and the freedom he found in Christ. He asked if I'd write his story. The weird thing about it.....he had written me tons of letters when he was incarcerated in the last prison....letters I've kept. In the back of my mind I always thought...one day I'm gonna write his story. His story is amazing. I want to honor what he lived and both of us want to help others to know the hope and freedom that comes from the touch of His gentleness.

Everyone needs compassion..a love that's never failing...everyone needs forgiveness...the kindness of a Savior

Thankful Thursday

2012-01-05T04:14:00.000-08:00

“But is it such a bad thing to live like this for just a little while? Is it so awful to nap in a garden, in a patch of sunlight, in the middle of the day, right next to your favorite fountain? And then to do it again the next day?” Elizabeth Gilbert

I just love love love these holiday weeks. They're so laid back. We go to bed whenever we feel like it...wake up any time we want....no rush...no nothing. A few more days of this before we have to get back into routines....back to normal living. But for now I'm loving every minute of it and am grateful for....

-The wonderful laid back easy life with no pressures, no programs, no rush.
-Get togethers with friends to watch movies, chat like crazy, and 'ouch' - eat more. I'm starting to feel chunky from all the home baked cookies, snacks and treats.
-Ice cold temps means no hiking in the woods so we bought a treadmill. I love hopping on it and blasting music so loud the kids dash downstairs to dance while I run.
-Instead of the kids waking me up early...I get to tiptoe in their rooms and pounce on them...love their groans and giggle fits.
-Mostly His presence in my life. He's there...always...in my corner....and makes life one awesome amazing adventure. There are already some things in the works for this year....ways to shine His Light....ways to give hope. Will write more as they happen. Thankful Thursday...thankful everyday.....all b/c of Him who turned turned my world upside down and made it the best.

A New Year

2011-12-31T05:36:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday & Laura at Beholding Glory

"Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right." Oprah Winfrey

2011 was mostly a good year...but still....there were tough things that happened that tore at my heart..... and in ways changed me.

My good friend Gaye Anderson lost her battle with cancer and my friend's sister got sick and died quickly and unexpectedly.

All year I received letters, gifts and emails from people who read my story, identified with it and wrote to tell me theirs. One was from a 13 year old who found my blog and reached out to me. Her many emails stunned me. I ended up working with the child abuse division of the police to locate her and ensure her safety. That experience showed me how powerful our words can be and how they can make a difference in someone's life.

I also learnt that life is fragile....and all we have for sure is this moment. For 2012 I want to keep reaching out...keep shining His Light....keep showing the hope that's in Him....b/c that's what really makes a difference.

Happy New Year Guys....Praying it'll be a good one.

I pray you'll be our eyes and watch us where we go and help us to be wise in times when we don't know.....

Thankful Thursday

2011-12-29T04:48:00.000-08:00

Linking with Shanda at Shanda Oakley Inspires

"You’ll miss all the best things if you keep your eyes shut.” Dr. Seuss

Everywhere....all around...life in its best. People and nature and things. I'm grateful to hear and see and smell the richness of everything around me. Once - a long time ago...I couldn't see any of it.....but after He turned the Light on....I could see clearly. I never ever want to forget to say thanks for things like....

-the faces of my children.....the sweetness in their smiles and the sparkle in their eyes. Seeing the world through their eyes renews my sense of fun and adventure. I just love that.
-Laughing with friends always eases the pressures of everyday life....and feels so darn good.
-Feeling loved....it's the real gift...the best one. And with love comes this incredible joy that makes me walk tall and gives me a spring in my step. It doesn't matter what happens...the love of my family and friends is what sustains me.
-My home...I love our home and our neighbourhood. There's really no place like home!!
-Mostly I'm grateful for His Grace and Peace....Without grace I wouldn't be here and without peace I'd never risk trying new things and living life to its best.

And So This is Christmas

2011-12-24T05:20:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday and Laura at Beholding Glory

"It's Christmas every time you let God love others through you. It's Christmas every time you smile at your brother and offer him your hand" Mother Teresa

I like the spirit of Christmas. I like the kindness and the way people go the extra mile to be nice. I like how people band together to raise money and gifts so that no one has to feel left out....alone....and empty.

I like all of it and I don't want it to be for just one month...or a few weeks or even one particular day. I want it to last...always...and I want it to outweigh the dark....the sad...the lonely and the hard times for all of us.

Christmas has this amazing feeling that seems to make us nicer. Christmas....it's all b/c of Him. I never could've imaged this kind of joy....or peace. Sometimes I shake my head to see if it'll disappear.....it never does. Instead...every day gets a bit more brighter. And I've learned...

"I'm not alone at all I thought. I was never alone. And that is the message of Christmas. We are never alone. Not when the night is darkest, the wind coldest, the world seemingly most indifferent" Taylor Caldwell

Merry Christmas Guys!

And so this is Christmas.....I hope you have fun......

Thankful Thursday

2011-12-22T04:13:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Joan at Reflections of His Grace

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that? Bob Hope

There's something magical about Christmas......an energy...an excitement. People smile more...they're kinder, more patient and giving. I never used to like holidays.....I never wanted to celebrate them. They felt too empty... lonely.....hollow. But this week I'm loving it and am grateful for.....

-We've been making heaps of potato pancakes...latkes in Hebrew. We've invited tons of friends to come over tomorrow night to celebrate the fourth night of Chanukah with us. The miracle - I don't cook....my sister walked me through the steps over the phone and the kids can't keep their paws off them.
-Everything about Christmas and Chanukah....the lights, the decorations, people's patience and kindness.
-My daughter's poem short-listed in a writing contest. She's now in the running to win... She's really proud of herself and I'm over the moon proud of her.
-Helping out at the outreach centres connected me to some of the most amazing people and reminded me there really are more good people in the world than bad.
-Mostly though for His love that holds me up when there's nothing else. His love cuts through all my fears....and doubts....and gives me peace which to me....is absolute best gift ever.

Did You Know.....

2011-12-17T04:16:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday and Laura at Beholding Glory

"Christmas can be celebrated in the school room with pine trees, tinsel and reindeers, but there must be no mention of the man whose birthday is being celebrated. One wonders how a teacher would answer if a student asked why it was called Christmas." Ronald Reagan

Last week I attended the play at my daughter's school. The kids were totally adorable.....but I've been thinking about their "Christmas" play. They sang ten songs about snow, winter, Santa, presents, one Chanukah song, a five minute talk about the Muslim holiday and it's meaning, world hunger......But no mention at all about what Christmas is really all about...nothing about a virgin giving birth to a Savior...

I grew up Jewish. We kept kosher...attended synagogue and waited for the Messiah.....the One God would send to 'free' His people.

One day in a hospital emergency room, under oxygen......I heard a voice say - pray in my name. Sounds hokey.....but it happened. I pushed away the oxygen.....sat up and whispered the name Jesus. As soon as I did.....I felt Someone touch me....and chains holding me tight fall off. I had been a drug addict since age 12. I never touched another needle after that. Even though I struggled with other things.....I now had an anchor.....and the courage to keep fighting.

The Christmas Story......it's about grace...and mercy...It's about love and a God who cares enough to free and heal anyone calls on His name.

We celebrate Chanukah and Christmas. Chanukah to remember that the Jews refused to assimilate with the those around them and the miracle of light that lasted eight days. And Christmas b/c He is the Light of the world that shines in darkness and His Light will never be extinguished.

Mary did you know.....that one day.....your baby boy will one day walk on water....

Thankful Thursday

2011-12-15T03:14:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Joan at Reflections of His Grace

The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. Lao Tzu

I've never liked waiting. I used to give up half way through projects....I didn't think they'd ever become what I wanted anyways....so why keep trying. But now I figured out.....everything takes time.....and waiting is key to advancing towards what I want. Dreams happen slowly....step by step.....not in one giant leap. This week I'm grateful for.....

-CF reviewing what I've written so far in my story The Game Player. She said she's loving it. Her words are my motivation to keep writing. I've got 29,000 words and wondering how I'll manage to get the next 29,000. But I'm going to keep writing...one word at a time....and hopefully....
-my 15 yr. old recieved a $100 to use towards entry into a local university. She came in third place for something she participated in. Although the money is a tiny fraction of what she'll need, it's given her the incentive to keep pushing forward toward her goals.
-We helped out a couple of days at a local outreach...sorting food, gifts and clothes and helping people chose items that they're family needs. The kids loved it and asked if they could do it more times. Everyone we met were amazing....the organizers, other volunteers and recipients. Reaching out....giving....being kind.....feels better than anything.
-My dgt wrote about me for one of her classes...she said I'm inspirational like Oprah and courageous as Anne Frank. I told her I'm not...that I'm just a fighter but she said in her eyes......I shine.
-Grace...I used to wish my life would magically change.....the abracadabra kind of grace.....but it's been a slow transformation....I think it's like building a house.....you got make sure one section is secure before putting on the next. I'm grateful for His kind of grace that's slow and steady. Me? I'd have done it all in one day which would've made everything collapse.

The Best Gift Ever

2011-12-10T08:07:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday & laura at Beholding Glory

“It only takes a split second to smile and forget, yet to someone that needed it, it can last a lifetime. Steve Marbolli

Those times I used to walk around with a huge hole in my soul still play in my head. I used to think the lonliness would kill me....and if it didn't.....the pain from everything that happened would.

Not only did I survive....but life completely turned around. Today.....I have an amazing family.....great friends.....And mostly.....His amazing peace and joy. I want to give back now.....what He and others gave to me.

One thing that made a huge difference - when someone smiled at me. Smiles...they go a long way......they're an incredible gift. I remember being in such a dark place.....then a stranger smiled at me....their kindness renewed my will to keep fighting. Their smile gave me hope.

Even today....when I'm having a yuck day.....and meet someone who flashes a warm smile - it lifts me out of that awful feeling...and amazingly turns my day around for the better.

Smiles - they made such a huge difference in my world....those people who gave them to me will never know how far reaching their simple gift went. Their smiles carried me....showed me a soft gentle side of life. A kinder side. I want to do that for others.....give them the the same kind of hope......and peace....and joy....I've been given....

I will carry you....Be your strength... pull you through....Reach for me.....take my hand
.

Thankful Thursday

2011-12-08T04:00:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Joan at Reflections of His Grace

“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.” Dr. Seuss

I've been feeling overwhelmed....
stressed....from the insane pressure of having to chose the perfect gift for so many people. I love giving and making people smile but this is nuts. I have only a few weeks to dash out, scout through as many stores as I can and find those perfect gifts that I hope people will like. I agonize too much over the task. What if I buy something and they don't like it. And some I know want a specific thing....and I can't find it!!! I've gone in one store...then another....and no one's got it. Okay. I got to remember to take a breathe....slow down.....and focus on what's really important....like those things I'm thankful for......

-My best friend and her family who always remind me no matter what...love rules.
-A teen who read my book....and emailed to tell me she loved it and it's inspired her to push forward and fight those things in her life.
-Spoke at Toastmasters......about Finding Your Voice. And it's true...I've found my voice through writing......and grateful for that.
-Went to my daughter's school play.....watching her shine....seeing her happy face....and the happy faces of all those kids. They're all so different....and each one so special.
-The perfect gift...the one He gave....that has gifted me with Light....Love......and Life

Gentleness

2011-12-03T06:41:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Charlotte Spiritual Sunday Laura Beholding Glory

The way to overcome the angry man is with gentleness, the evil man with goodness, the miser with generosity and the liar with truth. Indian Proverb

There''s a children's story about the wind boosting he was stronger than the sun. They saw a man walking and the wind challenged the sun. The proof who was stronger would be the one who could make that man take off his jacket. The wind went first. He blew and blew and blew and every time he did....the man wrapped his coat tighter around himself. When it was the sun's turn, he shone his warmth. Soon the man removed his jacket.

Gentleness......I think that's where real strength comes from....Being kind....caring....forgiving. When I lived in hate.....and anger.....wanting to hurt the people who hurt me.....I was like the wind....I pushed others away....and made my life cold.....hard.....and difficult.

The warmth of His gentleness broke through all that hardness. I couldn't resist that level of love and affection. Like the man who eventually took off his jacket......His gentleness helped me to let go of all the hate.....and forgive and let go.....And I figured out......real strength doesn't come from force or cruelty. It comes from someone's kind-heartiness....and respect.

Make me a channel of Your peace....where there is hatred let me bring Your love

Thankful Thursday

2011-12-01T02:41:00.000-08:00

"Mockingbirds don't do one thing but make music for us to enjoy. They don't eat up people's gardens, don't nest in corncribs, they don't do one thing but sing their hearts out for us. That's why it's a sin to kill a mockingbird." Harper Lee

Some things just make me happy. It's like they were born to do what they do.....to bring joy.....and make people feel good. I don't think they even know they're doing it....they just go about doing what they're meant to.....and in the process.....they give tremendous joy and peace. This week I'm thankful for.....

-My oldest daughter. She cares. Really cares about people, animals and the environment. I hear it when she tells me about her day...the kids she's hooked up with....her dreams to make a difference globally....and even when someone comes along and isn't the nicest...she somehow finds something in them worth praising.
-CF....she's been broken...really hurt but you'd never know it. She sees the good in everyone.....it's hard not to feel good around her.
-skunks. I know....everyone runs from them but I love them. Their small quirky bodies.....the way they waddle and even their smell...ok from a distance.
-blueherons - I had never seen one until we moved here. There's something about seeing them in flight with their huge wings that makes my heart soar. I can be having a really yuck day but if one flies by....boom......I'm happy again.
-The best is His presence. It's better than anything. It gives me so much joy that I want to run, dance, sing and just love the world.

Hiding Place

2011-11-26T05:49:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Charlotte Spiritual Sunday & Laura Beholding Glory

"I went to sleep with gum in my mouth and now there's gum in my hair and when I got out of bed this morning I tripped on the skateboard and by mistake I dropped my sweater in the sink while the water was running and I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. Some days are like that. Even in Australia” Judith Viorst

Yesterday was one of those horrible terrible no good very bad days.......a day I spent wondering what life was really all about...and why is there so much struggling....and hard stuff for so many. I moped all day.....feeling inadequate....unproductive.....blah....

At night my youngest curled up with me on the couch. I held her close.....looked in her big brown eyes.....and saw her love....and her trust knowing I'm there for her and always will be. That snapped me back to that place of knowing.....that some days are just yuck.....but I've figured out Who to run to....where I can hide.....and curl up with love and trust in my 'eyes.' I know He's there.....when I feel Him.....and even when I don't. He's running with me.....when things are amazingly awesome.....and even when they're not.

He is my hiding place. I will trust in Him.....

Thankful Thursday

2011-11-24T03:32:00.000-08:00

"I thank God for my handicaps, for, through them, I have found myself, my work, and my God" Helen Keller

Who'd think that anyone could be grateful for being born blind, deaf and dumb. But Helen Keller was. She discovered a secret that enabled her to rise above her handicaps and limitations. That's the kind of gratitude I want. Not just to be grateful for the neat things that happen but also all the tough stuff....the not so pretty things.....the problems....the mess-ups....the disappointments. So this week I'm thankful for things like......

-not having extended family...no grandparents for my kids....or aunts and uncles or cousins except a sister who lives too far away. I think b/c of that it's opened the door more to developing the great friendships I have.
-too many moves and changes......having to leave friends.....homes.....and familiar surroundings. It's given me resilience and a sense that no matter what......I can always start over.
-that it's taken so long to feel free and happy. I am pretty happy now, but it would have been nice if it hadn't taken so long....just saying.....
-Something I worked really hard on didn't work out the way I wanted......but still....I got so much fun just doing it.
-mostly for not trusting Him right from the start. I fought and struggled too much, but now...it's like our friendship has been tested and I know He's not going anywhere and neither am I. That's the ultimate best.

Only Hope

2011-11-19T07:49:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday & Laura at Beholding Glory & Karen at Hallelujah Anyhow

We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.”Martin Luther King, Jr.

Hope....to some it's a dangerous thing.....To others it's survival. Dangerous because the thing hoped for may never happen. Survival....because it's the thing that gives courage to keep holding on.

I know what it's like to flounder in the dark, to have no hope....but I also know what it's like to hold onto hope like a drowning person gripping onto a lifeline.

Hope is what kept me back from giving up..from letting go....from giving into the darkness. Hope was that crucial link that kept me hanging on when there wasn't anything else. And something amazing happened...the more I held onto hope...it slowly morphed into faith...a deep strong conviction....an inner knowing that what I desperately wanted.....would happen. I didn't know how....I just knew it would. I moved from thinking it might become reality to knowing that it was a definite.

And that faith eventually exploded into the miracle I needed. I learned hope transcends everything. It goes beyond all doubts....it silences fear....it quiets despair and more than that...no one can ever take it away.

There's a song that's inside of my soul.....It sings to me over and over again.

Thankful Thursday

2011-11-17T05:13:00.000-08:00

I live in the space of thankfulness. I've been rewarded a million times over for it. That’s because what you focus on expands, and when you focus on the goodness in your life, you create more of it. Oprah Winfrey

This week's been the best in so many different ways. It's not that things were spectacular in any way....or amazingly wonderful - it's just the little things that built up and culminated into one really happy week. There's a lot of stuff I'm grateful for this week...things like.....

-a publisher emailed me. Asked me to submit my full manuscript to them. That's a good thing but whatever they decide I'm okay with it.
-An opportunity has opened up for me to lead workshops in a women's prison. Things are in the process of being worked out and it's slowly coming together.
-my 15 yr. old got her report card and I am somersaulting over the moon proud of her. All her teachers scribbled a note that it's been a pleasure having her in their class. For me....it's a pleasure being her mom and even if she didn't excel in school she's one of the two best kids ever.
-time to write. Lots of it. Writing connects me to myself and gives me tremendous satisfaction.
-And the best....His whisper in my heart....reminding me He's got plans....super awesome ones....I can trust and know He's working out all the details. And what totally amazes me....I'm part of His plans..Me. and You and each of us...No one's left out. Totally love that!!!!

Surrounded

2011-11-12T04:06:00.000-08:00

Linking up with Charlotte Spiritual Sunday Laura Beholding Glory Karen Hallelujah Anyhow

“He finally understood that God's presence was everywhere, at all times, and experienced by everyone at one time or another.” Nicholas Sparks, The Last Song

Most days I walk around feeling really happy. It's not that there's any major reason for it.....It's just knowing that He's there....loving me.....always.....on those days I do awesome things I'm really proud of.....and on the days I blow it big time.

Love.....there was a time it hurt so bad.. a time if someone told me they loved me....I questioned what they wanted. It's weird but He never told me He loved me. He showed me....in a way that turned my world upside down. He broke through the colossal fears....scaled the wall I had erected so high....and waited. He wouldn't leave....not even when I screamed at Him...or did things to push Him away...Still He stayed. Even when I did those things I knew would hurt Him.....He wouldn't leave.....He hung in and kept showing me incredible love.

Love broke through.
Love healed my heart.
Love made the difference.
His love surrounds me and makes everyday the best ever.

You're the whisper calling my name gently...I can't live my life without You.......

Thankful Thursday

2011-11-10T05:00:00.000-08:00

I have found that among its other benefits, giving liberates the soul of the giver. Maya Angelou

There's an older couple near where I live....who made a fortune in horse-racing. They're well known b/c they give large sums of money to hospitals and nursing homes. But they have a stipulation when they give....they must be recognized. They want plaques put up in prominent places with their names and pictures shown and hospital wings to bear their name.

One hospital had a statue built of them. Another removed the long standing name of a woman who had made huge contributions to the city. They replaced hers with theirs after the couple demanded their name replace hers or they wouldn't give to that particular hospital.

Giving. I think it's better to give without expecting anything in return. To give from the heart. I'm grateful for those people in my world who give with no expectations of getting anything in return.

-the director of a centre who's given me a platform to share my story and who gives so much to many in need. She's not building a name for herself. She just really cares.

-my girls who have discovered the joy in giving. My youngest recently asked if we could help out again on Christmas day and with Christmas drive like we've done in previous years. "I love doing those things," she said. My heart puffed with pride b/c at 11 years old, she's figured it out....giving is the best...and the benefit...the incredible joy you get back.

-My friend S. is one of the kindest...most giving people I know. I had no extended family and from the first time I met her...her and her family have become like mine.She's always been there to help me out and hear me out.....She's the total best.
-Friends T & G have a dream to parent as many 'throw away' kids that they can.. They have two of their own and over the last few years have added four and still are open to more. They believe every kid deserves a home. How cool is that!!! They're making a huge difference one kid at a time.
-the best....Everything He's given me......more than I could have ever imagined. Still He keeps giving me neat things....like you guys....and great friends.....and so much of life's best. The thing about it....even though He's never demanded anything back.....I want my life to reflect the ultimate Giver.....Him who'se giving radically changed my life.

Miracles

2011-11-05T05:11:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday & Laura at Beholding Glory & Five Minute Friday

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” Albert Einstein

Miracles. They happen all the time. And they happen all around us. Everyday. In little things. And big.

When that thing we wanted so badly works out.....or a friend we haven't seen in awhile suddenly calls or shows up....or something that seemed impossible materializes....

Miracles.....our hopes, our dreams....those desires we wondered if could ever become reality - But amazingly....something clicks...things shift into place and POOF...there it is.....big and bold and real....right in front of us...a clear reminder that miracles really do happen.

Sometimes I think when they do ..it's like the icing on the cake....the best part....the thing that makes life totally exciting....and fun. It's the stuff that keeps me hanging on....never giving up on any hope or dream....b/c I think....if that one thing happened....other things will too. And besides...it just feels so good.

There can be miracles when you believe....

Thankful Thursday

2011-11-03T05:14:00.000-07:00

“Stories make us more alive, more human, more courageous, more loving.” Madeleine L'Engle

I love listening to people's stories...their journey's in life....and how they got to where the are. Some are funny, upbeat, positive...others are inspiring, challenging. All tweek something inside me. A hope that we're all trying to live out our best lives. It makes me grateful....thankful for stories that bridge us....Today I'm thankful for.....

-the six women who shared their hearts with me this week. Each one inspired me to walk more gently, more respectful.....from the outside looking at most of these women, you'd never know the tough stuff they struggle with.I'm honoured to have had them share pieces of their lives with me in a definite heartfelt way.
-my youngest told me a story....about being lost in the rainforest. She told me she was very dirty and needed me to send her lots of soap.....she wrote her creative story on little index cards and kept running in for me to read another piece of the story. I laughed so hard at her crazy imagination and saw a side of her that is so totally neat. She's my kid that I have to fight with to take a bath but once she's in the water, I have to fight to get her out.
-I wasn't going to do it....but at the last minute I decided to do the namowrite thingy. The goal is to write 50,000 words in 30 days. I'm writing about growing up Jewish and how that has framed my faith today. I didn't think I had a lot to say but I'm already over 3000 words.
-The stories of so many people live inside me. My cyber buddy Gaye Anderson who passed away a few months ago from Pancreatic Cancer.....Her stories about fly fishing....and how much she adored her father, husband and son still float in my head. An older man I met at the park while waiting for my girls....his tales about his cherished wife who passed a year ago....and why he loves nature and books and people are there too....and many of the stories from you guys.....funny ones....difficult ones to read.....inspiring ones....they're all there too.
-And the best...the one I could never ever forget.....His story....it's one that changed everything.....A story that really shines and which brought me from no hope to knowing hope.

Heros and Sheros

2011-10-29T05:26:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday & Laura at Beholding Glory & Five Minute Friday

How important it is for us to recognize and celebrate our heroes and she-roes! Maya Angelou

I spent the other morning being interviewed....telling my story - Afterwards I hung around and talked to some women. One told me she's reading my book....and is blown away with what I've come through. She said.....I'm her hero.

Those women have a story too. One moved from another country to settle here....to live in a new culture.....far away from family. The other had huge losses that rocked her world. Like me....she learned to fight. Her strength and courage was in her smile and gentle spirit.

Heros and Sheros. They're everywhere.....all around us...in our neighbourhoods...cities.....around the country......all over the globe - People who shine hope....and inspire courage....

Talking to those women made me think of the heros and she-roes in my life....people like.....

-my good friend who went through some terrible losses yet somehow always offered me and others encouragement and support.....

-A neighbour who lives miles away from family yet opens her heart to embrace me and my family.

-A good friend who took a stand for what she knew was right She risked her reputation for what she believed in.

-Inspirational friends who fight chemo, radiation, medical treatments...never complaining.....always giving the thumbs up sign...determined to beat their illness.

-And many of you....awesome bloggy buddies - whose stories I've come to know....overcoming losses, battling eating disorders and other addictions, fighting illnesses, standing strong as parents, grandparents, single parents....You guys empower me to live my best life......

Heros. She-roes shining courage....determination.....resiliance......and mostly hope.......

None are famous. But all have become the wind beneath my wings....the heros and sheroes in my world......

Did I ever tell you you're my hero? I would be nothing without You.....I can fly high like an eagle cause you're the wind beneath my wings...

Thankful Thursday

2011-10-27T05:11:00.000-07:00

"If stories come to you, care for them. And learn to give them away where they are needed. Sometimes a person needs a story more than food to stay alive" Barry Lopez

I'm finding...the things I lived.....those things I experienced had purpose. When I buried them, pretended they never happened....they held me a prisoner. Now that I choose to use them......to help someone else find hope, I feel happy.....peaceful....free. I sort of feel like a relay runner passing the torch......as if I'm part of some bigger picture. Gratitude. You bet. For things like....

-the women in the group I spoke to....for them sharing their life stories with me......for their tears....and their grasping onto hope.....and believing they too can make it.

-the writer.....a stranger who is becoming a friend.....for her reading parts of my new book.....and telling me she's loving it. I always think I can't write well...that what I'm saying isn't good enough and to have her say she's loving it and wants to read more...makes my heart fly.

-Spoke at Toastmasters. Shared about other people who happened into my life. Someone's feedback You kept me riveted. You're an amazing storyteller. Yeahhhh.

-Books...and reading...and words....I've been reading Mitch Albon's For One More Day. It's a small book with a huge message....it reminds me that people do the best they can with what they've been given.....Makes me want to walk more gently.

-Mostly for Him rewritting my story....changing its direction and letting it move towards a happier end.

Sidetracked

2011-10-22T06:33:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday & Laura at Beholding Glory

"I encourage everyone to become their dream. Most people become sidetracked and never end up doing what they really set out to do." James De La Vega

Earlier this week I found myself sidetracked...sliding off the path I had been on.....and heading in an entirely different direction.

It started when I met someone who made a suggestion...and for some reason I ran with it. It sounded good. Right. At least while we were talking about it. But when I left to go home.....I became discouraged. Hopeless. I didn't really want to do what she had said. It didn't feel right.

Two days later.....I met with someone....someone who'se been in my corner....who knows my story......and believes in me. As soon as I saw her, she turned and said the very thing I needed to hear. She had no idea of the other person's suggestion. She spoke her words with passion. And they hit their mark. Smack dab in the core of my heart.

I needed her words to get me back onto the right track. They gave me hope. Reminded me He has a plan. A purpose. And even when we get sidetracked...He's there. Waiting. Knowing we'll be back.

This becoming is harder than it seems.....

Thankful Thursday

2011-10-20T06:17:00.000-07:00

“It's been my experience that you can nearly always enjoy things if you make up your mind firmly that you will.” L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

It's been very autumnish....rainy, windy, chilly. Driving along the winding roads near our home I can't stop staring at the the trees in the hills. They're totally breath-taking and pure eye candy. It's strange to think that just a month ago they were all green. I absolutely love this time of year. And am thankful for.....

-the coziness of snuggling with my family on the couch, eating sunflower seeds and watching movies like The Ulitmate Gift that makes us cry our hearts out and then whoop and cheer because of the happy ending.
-looking out the window and watching the coloured leaves drift down and pile everywhere. What an amazing sight and it makes me think how cyclical life is....constant endings and new beginnings. It's what I've been feeling lately....that I'm at the end of what's been and on the verge of something new and exciting. Not sure what that is....but I just feel it inside.
-spoke to a group of women this week. It was great. Everyone started crying and sharing their hearts and thanked me.....but the truth....I'm grateful for them...to witness their courage and be part of their journey of healing and recovery. And I love that in some crazy way....we're all connected to each other.
-Something else I'm really grateful for...when I go off on my own tangent....and follow along wrong trails.....and get frustrated that things aren't what I imagined....I can always come back to Him....and know....He's there waiting. He always has my back.
-I'm grateful that He's the door-opener for all the neat things in my world. My faith is an anchor that grounds me and a springboard into amazing adventures.

The Bridge

2011-10-15T06:46:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday & Laura at Beholding Glory

“Better that one heart be broken a thousand times in the retelling if it means that a thousand other hearts need not be broken at all.” Elie Wiesel

Sometimes....I want to stop telling my story....stop sharing what happened.....and speaking about the time I lived in darkness....believing it would never get better....and that I would die in all that bleak emptiness...

But then I stand up....and tell....I share what I lived.....how things got so dark. Then.....I get to say the best.....how I survived.....

Everytime I tell.....I know that I'll never stop telling.....I will live forever speaking my story....forever sharing....the hope He gave....the difference He made.....

It doesn't matter how uncomfortable or scary it feels anymore.....I don't want anyone to ever give up....to ever lose their fight....to die without hope.

So I'll tell and keep telling what He did....how He broke the chains that kept me living on the edge. And now He's in me....the hope....and the assurance... that nothing's impossible to overcome......

When you're down and out...I will comfort you....like a bridge over troubled water....

Thankful Thursday

2011-10-13T05:47:00.000-07:00

"Don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can't hear, and not bothering" Winnie the Pooh

Not everyday is the best. Like yesterday. It was one of those yuck ones....the kind that I didn't feel like doing anything.. I even skipped some things I know I shouldn't have. But by supper time, I was grateful that I had spent it 'doing nothing.' I used to think....it wasn't okay to chill.....to take a day off....and do nothing....but sometimes that's exactly what I need. I'm thankful for.....

-record breaking temps..they hit in the mid 80's....perfect for being laid back and relaxing....
-hiking in my favorite place.....the hills near where we used to live.....and hiked everyday. I still know every path, every dip, every trail..It felt like coming home.
-Our home that's comfortable....safe.....a retreat full of neat creature comforts.....I always think of those people who have no home....or live in homes with so much angst....
-Fall season....one of my favorites. I love the cozy feel.....the crunch of leaves under my feet....and brilliant coloured leaves....total eye candy....
-Mostly...I'm soo soo grateful for Him loving me....even when I'm not at my best. I'm still amazed that when I feel like giving up.....He hangs in with me.....never lets go....never gives up. When I feel yuck....He's there....always encouraging.....always supportive....always patient.

I Know Who I Am

2011-10-08T05:25:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday & Laura at Beholding Glory

"I know what I want, I have a goal, an opinion, I have a religion and love. Let me be myself and then I am satisfied. I know that I’m a woman, a woman with inward strength and plenty of courage." Anne Frank

I feel this strength inside......and a purpose.......a direction for my life. There's things I want to do.....ideas I want to make happen.....goals I want to see accomplished. I'm excited...about life....and living.

I didn't always feel this way. I saw no purpose...no reason for life. I contemplated giving up....taking my life. Everything was too dark....meaningless.

But now life has become an amazing adventure. Every day....another opportunity to make a difference in someone's life. Everyday....another to show His awesomeness....and how He can make a difference.

I know who I am....I have a goal....an opinion....I have my faith and love...and It's because of Him...His touch.....His amazing love...He gave me purpose...and a reason to live...

People said things couldn't change....they gave up on me....He never did. I want to shine His light for others.....and stand strong.....to show life really does have meaning and they value.

I know who I am....I have a goal....an opinion.....I have my faith.....and love.......Happy Thanksgiving Guys!

I know who I am........

Thankful Thursday

2011-10-06T05:11:00.000-07:00

"Without gratitude, we have no wings. The highest and best freedom is to feel ever-increasing gratitude." Laura Teresa Marquez

Some weeks are amazing....in fact.....they're almost perfect.. This week has been one of those....an awesome week....a week that's been affirming..... empowering. And it's been a reminder life really does hold meaning.. I'm grateful for......

-the group of women who came to hear me speak....for the opportunity to tell my story....and to show that nothing is impossible to overcome. They left hopeful....I left humbled. And I get to do it again next week.
-Won the Barnabes Award for my writing. A sign for me...there's purpose in my writing.
-Writing ....I've written 53,000 words in my Dancing Softly story. I get so caught up in it....in the hope I want to show...spending hours trying to string words together in a way that slides down into the heart of whoever's gonna read it.....it's the best feeling ever.
-Friends that are kindred spirits...and like the family I never had. People like M and R and S who are there always.....steady.....supportive....in my corner....believing the best in me...They give me wings to fly.
-Mostly for Him reaching so far down to pull me out of darkness. He's the one that really gave me wings to fly.....and He's the one who truly made me a winner. He's become my anchor and hope.....no matter how dark things might get.....His Light will always eventually shine.

I Can Only Imagine

2011-10-01T06:42:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday and Laura at Beholding Glory

"Most of us can't even begin to imagine" Meg Whitman

Most days are ordinary.....regular kind of days.....but in the middle of them.....I sometimes feel this wild explosive feeling bubble up inside. A joy....an amazing feeling that's hard to contain. It comes from Him...I know it...from being in His presence. From taking time to talk to Him and mostly to hear Him talk to me. It's when I walk alone in nature...in the woods or along the lake near our home.....It's when I close myself off from the phone, from people....from activities...... and take time.....just to be with Him.

When I feel it.....I always think of when you shake a soda bottle.....and the soda fizzles and pushes against the insides of the bottle. And if you open the lid.....it explodes and gushes all over the place. That's it exactly. That's how I feel.

Joy.....it comes from Him.
Joy.....I never could have imagined it was possible to feel like this
Joy.....it's the best feeling ever. It makes me want to run...dance....shout
Joy.....it makes me feel alive and strong and determined to be the best I can to shine for Him.

I can only imagine what it'll feel like when I walk by Your side......

Thankful Thursday

2011-09-29T02:14:00.000-07:00

"You can always, always give something, even if it is only kindness!" Anne Frank

There have been times when I felt that life was too hard......and to feel the kindness from someone is to breathe again. Kindness.....it goes a long way......makes a huge difference. In my darkest moments someone's kindness gave me hope. In my everyday moments someone's kindness makes me happy. Kind people make the world a softer more gentle place. I'm grateful for.....

-my 15 year old. She has the most gentle kind attitude not just with her family but everyone.
-blogger buddies....you guys are the absolute best. Many of you have taken time to email me....reach out.....say hi....your smiles through your posts and emails always light up life.
-A fellow writer - we just met and she's not only advertising my book in her cafe but is helping critique the book I'm working on. Her kindness made my day.
-the cashier in a store where I shop. That lady always smiles....is always friendly......and always kind. Even if I'm grumpy when I go in, I always feel great when I leave.
-The best is His amazing kindness that cut through my anger and hurt and taught me how to give the gift of kindness to myself and others.

Ordinary Days

2011-09-24T04:13:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday and Laura at Beholding Glory

"You can find something truly important in an ordinary minute." Mitch Albom

Sometimes I wake up and think....it's gonna be another regular day...ordinary....nothing out of the norm.....but then... something happens and it turns into the best day ever....a day of connecting with someone amazing...a day to share my story and give hope.....a day to accomplish something I thought I just couldn't do....but somehow did....

And I know......it's because He's in my world....opening doors...closing other ones....always there....in my corner....making me smile....showing me things that light up my life.....and introducing me to people I'd never have met without Him.

With Him on the journey....life's a cool adventure. Sometimes I make plans for the day.....but then half way through it....everything changes.....and the ordinary becomes spectacular.....amazing......exceptional......and I know it's cause of Him.....

When the new day begins Your mercies are new again....You said You'd never leave....and I believe.....I'm so grateful You are my friend......

Thankful Thursday

2011-09-22T03:59:00.000-07:00

“Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.” Maya Angelou

Simple pleasures! It's the little things that make life special.....those moments or things that make the world seem right and perfect even if just for a bit. This week I'm grateful for.....

-reading my daughter's poetry. Her heart is incredibly beautiful. I'm humbled by her sweet gentle spirit and honored to hear her words.
-listening to my youngest practice guitar and the two of us imagining her hitting the big times one day.....another Taylor Swift or Hilary Duff.....and then her and I cracking up and rolling on the floor laughing.
-hiking with a special friend. She's been coming over every week to see me, to walk together and to share pieces of her life. We've been doing this for a few months now.....both of us now feel a tight bond....a strong connection and a commitment to keep going.
-Writing.....I love sitting down at the computer.....and the ideas flowing....scenes unfolding....plot developing....and characters coming to life. I get lost for hours...caught up in the storyline....and always feeling deeply satisfied inside.....
-The best are the moments when I feel His gentle touch...and remember that His story lives in me with every breath I breathe. It's His amazing touch that has given me incredible love and tremendous peace.

Knowing Hope

2011-09-17T06:38:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte at Spiritual Sunday & Laura

"The desire to reach for the stars is ambitious. The desire to reach hearts is wise." Maya Angelou

How does someone find hope in the dark? How do they hold on when everything in them screams to let go? I think hope comes from hearing that someone else made it.

A friend called....told me she gave my book to her Muslim friend. When she went to visit her, the woman was reading my book. She said she had been reading all day and couldn't put it down.

Someone I met at a party emailed to say she bought my book...finished it in a day and went out and got a copy for her daughter.

I bumped into someone I had worked with. He told me he heard that I wrote a book. He wanted to read it. He asked if it was my story. When I said yes, he became serious and said there was something he had never told anyone......

I think we all have stories to tell....maybe not in written form....but by living our lives...pointing to the Light....showing hope. A friend once apologized for having an easy life. I told her....her life has given me tremendous hope.....showing me that I could live 'normal' and free. I've taken so much from her.....her calm attitude....easy going nature....ability to trust when things go wrong...healthy self-esteem.....

Giving hope...touching lives. It's what I want to do. And the thing is....His Light shines in the darkness and makes all the difference.

You are the hope living in us. You are the source of heaven's hope on earth......

Thankful Thursday

2011-09-15T05:46:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Dayle at Simple Pleasures

"To be at one with God is to be at peace" Ralph Waldo Trine.

Its been a wild week.....programs restarting, new ones happening, setting goals....just a whirlwind of excitement. I love Autumn...especially the month of Sept. It hold so many new hopes.....new starts...new beginnings of amazing things to come. Simple pleasure...beginnings and feeling life is the way it's supposed to be...So grateful this week for:

-Amazing friendships. Went for a 2 hour walk with some good friends. We talked so much the time flew by.

-Another family and ours have been swapping things back and forth...things one of us doesn't need anymore but the other does. It's nice to recycle with buddies.....

-sold five more books today. Sometimes I think my book has run its course and then...whomp...another purchase.

-Books. I just finished reading Sarah's Key. It's a phenomenal read and a book I couldn't put down. I was over at a friend's place who didn't know I had read the book. She said she heard about a good movie that just came out and asked if I wanted to see it. Yep....it's Sarah's Key. We're going tomorrow.

-Peace...it still amazes me that He's given me this incredible peace inside....a peace that's like nothing I get from anything else.....peace...it's always there.....reassuring and comforting....no matter.......a gift that's forever.

What I Want

2011-09-10T04:20:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte and Ginger at Spiritual Sunday

"We need much less than we think we need" Maya Angelou

Sometimes I think I want something. Soon I start thinking I really need to have it. When I get it....it hits me.....I can't handle it...it's too much...I don't want it anymore.

Recently....there was something I thought I wanted. People encouraged me to go for it. But when I finally did get it....it was too much. I hadn't realized what having it really meant....the changes I'd need to make....the work involved to maintain it....

When I let it go.....gave it back.....I felt immediate relief....and realized some things....what might be right for someone else may not be right for me. And filling my life up with things isn't what brings happiness.

I saw a woman being interviewed on the news. Her home and all her possessions burned in the Texas fires. First she cried....then smiled and said, I'm grateful. My family and I were not hurt. Now I need to go check on my neighbours. That's what I want....what she has....a grateful spirit in whatever life gives......being content with the important things..life, family, friends.... being alive....and caring for others.

Praying for all those affected by Texas fires; and those hit with floods.

All that I want in my life is that feeling of peace.....

Thankful Thursday

2011-09-08T04:33:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Dayle at Simple Pleasures

"You'll not be the same person after consciously giving thanks for the abundance that exists in your life. And you will set in motion a spiritual law: the more you have and are grateful for, the more will be given you." Sarah Ban Breathnach

It's been a strange week....excitement with kids starting back to school, record breaking hot temps falling to rainy cool ones, buying a new puppy, and the start back of groups and activities.
This week I'm grateful for a few things in particular..things like;

-puppy training doesn't last forever....soon the little guy will be able to sleep through the night.
-seeing people I've missed over the summer b/c they've been away or we've been away.
-having my story written in an upcoming newsletter with other inspirational stories to give hope to others. The interview will happen the 3rd week this month.
-pushing past writer's block. An award winning author read pieces of the new book I'm working on, Dancing Softly. Her encouragment and suggestions helped me push past writer's block. Since...I've been writing everyday....waking up eager to flesh out the story.
-Creative gifts. I think He's given creative gifts to all of us - art, writing, knitting, crafting, gardening, teaching....something. He created the big picture and He's given each of us that part of Himself that loves to make and create things.

Happy Day

2011-09-03T03:40:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte and Ginger at Spiritual Sunday

"Sometimes I need only to stand wherever I am to be blessed." Mary Oliver

Most days are pretty typical....nothing major happens...just everyday kind of stuff....no biggies....no extraordinary 'kapow' kind of things.

But it's those normal daily moments......like when the kids clean the dishes without being asked.....or going for a hike in the hills and spotting a blueheron in flight......or a friend calling to say they care. Those things are the best.

I used to feel restless....always needing to keep moving. I used to feel that life had no purpose....and me...no value. Now... because of His peace....and the touch of His gentleness on my life......I can stand wherever I am and feel amazingly happy and 'blessed.'

Everyday is another day to kick back, take in a breathe, trust that He's got a plan and live my best life.

Things change...people change....but He never does. It doesn't matter what happens...what the day has in it....because He's there.....in my corner.....now.....and for always.

His eye is on the sparrow and I know He watches over me.......

Thankful Thursday

2011-09-01T05:22:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Dayle at Simple Pleasures

Hakuna Matata! It means no worries. Pumbaa

The week has been a squeeze to take advantage of the last bit of summer....the week before the kids go back to school. When they do....it changes back....early bedtimes.. no more sleeping in....homework....appointments...structure...routines. The laid back no worries of summer has been great.....but it's time...to get back into routines.....and move forward into a year of new adventures. I'm grateful ......

-that the summer has been great....with awesome trips and time spent with good friends.
-for long hikes in the mountains.....through new trails and old.....
-for being able to swim, bike, be outside everyday.....in the woods...at the beach.....in the garden.....
-for warm sun, soft rain, light clothes....drives in the country....discovering quaint towns.....celebrating fun festivals
-Mostly I'm grateful He gave us the different seasons....and change.....the leaves are starting to turn colors...it's getting darker earlier. I'm looking forward to Fall....and the leaves crunching under my feet....and cool breezes and even routines. I wonder if He gave us seasons as a way to show that changes in life are necessary. Nothing ever stays the same....but that's okay...I think each season....each stage of our lives has it's own purpose and beauty. I'm grateful He made it like this.....grateful for each season and for what each offers.

Guided

2011-08-27T06:21:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte and Ginger at Spiritual Sunday

"Faith is like radar that sees through the fog-the reality of things at a distance that the human eye cannot see." Corrie Ten Boom

We were away...up north....in the mountains...having a blast....and then....on the way home....coming back....we took a wrong turn...and drove for five hours before realizing we had no idea where we where going.

We flipped on the radio and heard a storm warning for the next day. We wanted to get home before that happened...but we couldn't make it.

Finally exhausted, we pulled over, stopped the car....held hands and prayed. We didn't make it home but we found a perfect hotel....and they they had a room and waterpark for the kids. We had a great night.

My 15 yr. old said, Everything happens for a reason.
I thought.....There was no reason this happened.....we just made a wrong turn.

The next morning driving home...we heard on the radio....a terrible storm had passed in our hometown.....trees down, electricity out, damage to homes and cars. My dgt. piped up, Everything does happen for a reason.

God knew.....our wrong turn turned out to be a right road. Makes me think.....just b/c something doesn't make sense at the time.....I'm gonna trust 'cause He knows what's down the road...He knows how to protect us....and keep us safe.

To everyone in the path of Hurricane Irene...stay safe......Praying that for all of you.

This is my song of praise to You for who you are and all that you do......

Thankful Thursday

2011-08-25T05:01:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Dayle at Simple Pleasure

“Gratitude helps you grow and expand; gratitude brings joy and laughter into your life and into the lives of all those around you.” Eileen Caddy

This week we've been away....up north...way up...in the mountains. It's true ...the hills really are alive with the sound of music and being out in them....you can hear their song everywhere you step. This week I'm thankful for

-Mountains.....we hiked. all over them....breathing in their power and awesomeness

-Dominique....someone we met who touched all of us.Her kindness to us made the trip even more special.

-Stones - we spent time fishing for stones in the lakes - so many difference colored and shaped ones. A small thing but something that brought so much joy with each amazing find.

-Guidance -coming home we made a wrong turn and drove 5 hours before realizing we had no idea where we were. We finally found out that we were going in the wrong direction. We prayed and were led to an amazing hotel that was perfect.....the people were wonderful and it even had a waterpark for the kids.

-The beauty He provided - He made all this...the mountains....the lakes...the variety of flowers and stones.....the animals...all of it for us to enjoy. I think He knew there would be times we would become discouraged....and going outside...in His creations renews faith and hope like nothing else could.

Loved

2011-08-20T06:57:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte and Ginger at .....Spiritual Sunday

"Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope" Maya Angelou

Feeling loved gives me courage.....it makes me strong. Real love....the kind that doesn't hold grudges or expectations....that forgives mistakes and misunderstandings.....that accepts me as I am and that goes the extra mile and even the extra extra mile. Love - an incredible force that makes all the difference.

It's what changed my life.....

His love....that cared so much...even when I resisted...
His love - patient, steady, present - that reached so far down to pull me out of darkness.
His love that didn't look at what I was...but saw what I could be.....
His love....made the difference....cut through the hate...the anger...the hurt.
His love never gave up.....hung in with me....waited patiently until I was ready.....
His love....always present...and even still....never giving up....

I want my life to shine that kind of love to others....to be more like Him....in reaching out....shining hope...being a friend....

He accepts you at your worse.....He loves you just because.......

Thankful Thursday

2011-08-18T04:35:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Dayle at Simple Pleasures

"Love life. Engage in it. Give it all you've got. Love it with a passion because life truly does give back, many times over, what you put into it." Maya Angelou

Life...it's an adventure.....full of neat opportunities everywhere..... and amazing people....people who make a difference...who give courage..... and hope.....who offer support.....and care....His angels.....on earth....who show kindness.....and touch my life with pieces of their own....people I'll never forget and opportunities that I'm really grateful for, like....

-exchange students.....my friend is hosting three students from other countries. We went over to meet them and took two of them back to our place and then for a hike in the woods. The next day all the students met to share the highlight of their week and those two students said their highlight was meeting us
-more exchange students.....we met some more of the students. One guy, K, really stood out for me....Back in his home, he volunteers in an orphanage teaching the kids what he's learning at university. He told me orphans never have the opportunity to go to college or university and when they turn 18, they're given jobs in factories. What a neat guy for caring so much.
-Shortlisted....I found out my story, Murder in the Falls, shortlisted for the Polar Expressions Contest. Being shortlisted means my story will be published in their anthology in December. And it's still in the running to possibly win...winners will be chosen mid Dec.
-You guys....although I may never meet most of you.....you guys inspire and encourage me so much....I hope I do the same for you...I am totally grateful for all of you!!!

-Purpose...Knowing and being connected to Him has given my life meaning....and purpose. Because of Him....life has become a very cool adventure.....

Don't Give Up

2011-08-13T02:07:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte and Ginger at....Spiritual Sunday

Miracle make-over - For all comments left at Design Gives Back, money will be donated for a miracle make over room for little Charlie.

"Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!" Audrey Hepburn

Some days...it seems like everything's a struggle....an uphill climb.....nothing's working...nothing's moving....life is tough...hard....even lonely. The dreams I hold....that burn inside....seem like they'll never happen.....They start...then stop....and make me feel stuck.

But then.....I go outside....in the woods....or down to the lake....alone.....and His whisper...soft but clear....reminds me....He's there...running with me....and those dreams....He put them there. How can I be discouraged....How can I not trust....and know....that in time....His time.....

Don't give up.....I will shine to guide you......
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Thankful Thrsday

2011-08-11T04:37:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Dayle at Simple Pleasures

"Meditate. Breathe consciously. Listen. Pay attention. Treasure every moment. Make the connection." Oprah Winfrey

The week's been great - busy, fun, laid back. I have so many neat things in my world....things that make life interesting and full....things like.

-Squirrels. They're everywhere and so fun..We were hiking when this little grey one started following us. When we stopped. He stopped. When we moved...he moved. It started getting freaky so my dgt. yelled at him to quit following us. He jumped onto a tree....and my dgt. snapped a pic of him sticking out his tongue. Too funny.
-Rain. It rained for two days and brought a cool breeze...and perfect temps. And the bonus...it's going to be like this right through the weekend!
-Close friends......there's nothing better than laughing with a buddy...especially the kind of laughing that's hard to stop.....
-Purpose....met with someone I'll be running events with. Plans are in the works for the two of us to run community forums on hope at the end of Sept.....
-Peace...mostly for Him never giving up on me...never turning away. Some people will come and go...but He never leaves...never lets go....and loves me just because.....

It's Time.....

2011-08-06T04:55:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte and Ginger at Spirtual Sunday

"I live in a crazy time.” Anne Frank

It's been so hot these last few weeks that we've been indoors more...watching tv.....reading the newspapers....something we don't usually do. It seems every day there's another more horrific story that is shocking and scary.

Abductions, murders, rape, madmen on killing sprees, global financial markets struggling, famines, droughts, killer tornadoes, record breaking heat, outbreak of deadly infections......

My sister called to say she's afraid of what's happening.....and she wonders if these are all signs of the countdown to the end of the world. It is scary...and shocking....listening....watching...reading about everything that's taking place....

But I think there's hope.....there's an answer....a promise of something that can take the bad....and turn it into something good. I believe....

It's time for the rein of God.....it's time for Your Light to shine......

Thankful Thursday

2011-08-04T05:18:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Dayle a Simple Pleasures

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more.
It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend" Melody Beattie

The kids have been at camp....canoeing, hiking, having fun. Me? I've been busy around the house.... writing...reading...and thinking about stuff....mostly about all the good things in my life....They're so many of them....things like....

-My youngest. She makes life fun. A few months ago my dgt. wanted a fish. Being cheap I bought her five little feeder fish for 20 cents a piece. They lasted a month. My dgt. said she wanted another one....a more expensive one. I splurged. I paid $5.00 for a fancy goldfish. She named it Jimmy. Who names their fish Jimmy? But my dgt. loves him...and he makes her happy. Jimmy has hung around for six months and still going strong.
-Rain. Last couple of days it rained. Not a downpour but still...rain. I think I heard the plants and flowers sigh.
-Opportunities. I've been booked to speak every month, once a week starting in the fall and in the first few months in 2012. I've also been talking with a distributor about the possibility of them distributing my book across North America.
-Time spent with family. I've got an amazing family. I really do. I don't know how that happened.....but I'm so grateful for them.
-His friendship - It boggles my mind that He created the whole earth.....every living animal...all the flowers.....and trees and plants and everybody in the world....and yet......He calls me His friend.....that's totally incredible to me.

I thank God....

2011-07-30T05:46:00.000-07:00

Linking up with Charlotte and Ginger at Spiritual Sunday

"How does one become a butterfly? she asked pensively. You must want to fly so much that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar." Paulus Trina

We watched a 3D Imax movie the other day....'Bugs.' I expected it to be some gross show about insects....but it wasn't at all. I loved how they detailed the life cycle of various bugs and personified them. They showed how everything in creation has a purpose.....even down to the smallest living thing.

What I loved best.....watching a little caterpillar's journey to becoming a butterfly. When she formed her cocoon, it held onto a branch by one thin silk-like thread. That's it. When the time was right, the inside of the cocoon liquified and the metamorphosis began.....the caterpillar became a gentle butterfly...and learned how to fly.

It made me think....how I once held onto a thin thread of hope.....and then His gentle touch....melted the hardness.....helped me break free...taught me how to fly.

That butterfly became prey to a praying mantis. All that was left....it's wings floating in the river. The kids and I felt sad at first....but then......the narrator declared the butterfly's life although brief, was not wasted. It showed another little caterpillar.....coming out of its shell...starting the cycle again. ...a result of that butterfly's life.

I want my life to have purpose....to give life to others....to help them break free and learn how to fly.

I thank God for His love.....I thank God for life.....